WILMINGTON, N.C., February 5, 2023 /24-7press release/ — We all like to think that a new year somehow gives us a fresh start. We reflect, set new goals and plan actions. But is the new year really new? Will anything change? What if we live in an assisted living community? Will anything be new? Frances Fuller, award-winning author of Helping Yourself Grow Old, addressed this topic in a recent post on her website. She wrote:
A new year is upon us as I still look back.
Just a few months ago I met a new resident of the assisted living community in the laundry room. She was beautiful, her eyes were a kindly blue, her gray hair lay in soft waves, her smile brightened up this dreary little room. She had a question about the dryer. And she, in her clothes so neat and elegant, admired my jacket and said she’d like it if I ever didn’t want it anymore.
I met her here and there. In the hall the lounge. I want you. We compared stories about how we inherited our old-fashioned names.
One day, in the dining room, she opened the basket of her walker and showed me how she prepared for any emergency. disinfectant. lip balm. Tissue. A roll of toilet paper and other items, mostly things we don’t talk about in polite company. We enjoyed a wonderful laugh.
Just days later, she was untidy, disheveled, and disoriented. After that I didn’t see her again. I heard she fell. I heard she was taken to Memory Care. And then her picture popped up in the In Memoriam corner this week. So early. Too early.
None of the things in her basket were about dying.
A year ago, when 2022 approached and gave us hope that Covid would go away and take some of our problems with it, I didn’t quite realize how quickly people sometimes lapse without a pandemic. And that seems somehow relevant to thinking about the year ahead.
Already today I politely wished several people a Happy New Year.
But will the year be new? In any way at all?
Will we resolve any of our differences? Heal wounds? Avoid incoming conflicts? defeat diseases? become younger? Are you seeing something wondrous that we have never seen before?
Or was the preacher’s poet-philosopher right when he said, “There is nothing new under the sun”?
Well, one of the things I finally understood this year is that “under the sun” means just that: from an earthly perspective. In the physical realm, which we know too well, the sun rises and sets and rises again without changing anything.
There is nothing new. This is the obvious, worldly and pessimistic view.
And this, says the wise poet, is why her Maker should be remembered, remembered before she is bowed and the lights are dimmed and the songs are muted and she doesn’t care.
So the “new” year is approaching and what should we pray for relevant members of our family or for us seniors in assisted living?
That, like my beautiful friend with her walker, we are all prepared for any emergency? The failure of the body, the confusion of the mind?
Why not? We had it better. We all face emergencies. . .
Readers can then see the entire piece and subscribe on their website at http://www.francesfullerauthor.com.
Frances Fuller’s book is unique among the many books on aging because it is personal, while most of these books are written from an academic perspective. Most are from sociologists, doctors, gerontologists, even the CEO of AARP, and one from a Catholic nun, Joan Chittister. Chittister’s book The Gift of Years is beautifully written and focuses on spiritual values and finding meaning in life. Chittister admits in the foreword that she was only 70, which is the leading edge of aging, and her book is somewhat abstract.
Atul Gawande’s book On Being Mortal relates to medicine and aging and enjoys high Amazon rankings in the Sociology of Aging category. It contains a lot of valuable scientific information and shows an understanding of the physical and emotional needs of older people.
Frances Fuller’s book, Helping Yourself Grow Old, Things I Said To Myself When I Was Almost Ninety, is an up close and personal encounter with aging. It’s a candid and up-close look at her own daily experiences: struggling with physical limitations, grief, loneliness, fears and the choices she made to deal with them and become a better person. Faced with regret and the need to forgive herself and others, she is determined to live in a way that will bless her children and grandchildren.
Frances addresses many common, universal, but sometimes private issues in an open, conversational tone. Their confessions and decisions invite self-exploration and discussion. She is trying to understand her own past and her responsibility to younger generations. She shares her everyday life, enriched with memories of her fascinating experiences. Her stories and her voice – fresh, honest, irresistible – make you want more. The end result is a book that helps create a detailed map through the challenging terrain of the ages.
The result of this intimate narrative is that readers laugh, cry, and identify with their mistakes and problems. Reviewers have called the book “unique,” “honest,” “funny,” “poignant,” “challenging,” and “life-changing.”
For these reasons, it is a book like no other book on aging you will ever read. The book can serve as a basis for what lies ahead for all of us from someone working through many of these issues. While the book is perfect for book clubs, there are many other individuals and groups who could benefit from the information and ideas in the book:
Those who are close to retirement
Individuals who are currently retired
children of aging parents
Those who have lost a spouse
Senior Citizens Discussion Groups
Advisor
pedagogues
life coach
Church groups (men and women)
and a bunch of others. For group discussions, Fuller has made a set of discussion questions available on her website at http://www.FrancesFullerAuthor.com.
Readers have showered the new book with praise. One Amazon review said, “I think I need to re-read that and take notes!” It’s full of wisdom, humor, and grace. I also intend to read it again every year – it’s so important!” Another said: “There is valuable life experience in this book. Helping Yourself Grow Aging is truly a book for all ages and one not to be missed.” Another said, “Beautifully written book telling timeless truths for both the old and the young. I highly recommend this book to anyone who loves to laugh, cry and learn wisdom from someone who has lived so much.”
Frances’ previous work, In Borrowed Houses, won three industry awards and has achieved best-seller status. Frances Fuller was the grand prize winner at the 2015 50 Great Writers You Should Be Reading Book Awards. It received the bronze medal for memoir at the 2014 Illumination Book Awards was produced by residents of the region. In 2015, “In Borrowed Houses” received two awards: Best Nonfiction and Best Cover.
Critics have also praised “In Borrowed Houses”. A judge at the 22nd Annual Writer’s Digest Self-Published Book Awards called “In Borrowed Houses” “…a well-written book full of compassion…an engaging story…”. Another reviewer described the book as “Wise, honest, insightful, funny, heartbreaking…”. Colin Chapman, Lecturer in Islamic Studies at the Middle East Theological School in Beirut, said: “…Western and Middle Eastern Christians must read this story…with remarkable insight and genuine hope.”
Frances shared stories about her life in an interview with Women Over 70, and a recording is available on her Facebook page.
Frances Fuller is available for media interviews and can be reached using the information below or by email at [email protected]. The full text of her latest article is available on her website. Fuller’s book is available from Amazon and other booksellers. A free e-book sample of In Borrowed Houses is available at http://www.payhip.com/francesfuller. Frances Fuller also blogs on other Middle East-related topics on her website at http://www.inborrowedhouseslebanon.com.
About Frances Fuller:
Frances Fuller spent thirty years in the violent Middle East, twenty-four of those years as director of a Christian publishing program with offices in Lebanon. While directing the development of spiritual books in Arabic, she survived long years of civil war and invasions.
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